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Blame and Responsibility
- By Jim Stovall
- Published 08/14/2009
- Personal Development
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Jim Stovall
Jim Stovall is the president of Narrative Television Network, as well as a published author of many books including The Ultimate Gift. He is also a columnist and motivational speaker. He may be reached at 5840 South Memorial Drive, Suite 312, Tulsa, OK 74145-9082, or by e-mail at Jim@JimStovall.com
View all articles by Jim Stovall
Human beings seek to avoid the feeling of randomness; therefore, we want to establish blame or responsibility for everything that happens. Control is an illusion just as blame and responsibility are impossible to clearly establish. We judge our own intentions while judging everyone else’s actions. This gives us a skewed perspective on the world.
When you are late for a commitment you have made, you instantly mentally blame the traffic, the incompetent cashier at the gas station, and the woefully-inadequate parking. When a colleague is late, you instantly are able to blame their lack of commitment, their poor planning, and overall irresponsible nature.
Tolerance comes when we take responsibility for our own performance and try to understand other people’s intentions. This is hard to do, but few things that are worthwhile are easy. When we fail to take responsibility for our current situation, we give elements outside of our control far too much power. In the process of blaming external factors, we turn over the steering wheel and the accelerator to randomness.
There is always an excuse for failure, whether it is real or imaginary. In the final analysis, failure will bear no excuse, and success needs no explanation. Only those who take full responsibility for where they are today can control where they can be tomorrow.
As I’m dictating this column, I just finished enjoying the satellite coverage of the U.S. Open golf tournament. At the conclusion of the four-day event, the announcers and knowledgeable commentators were discussing slow motion replays of a shot taken by a player who ended up in second place. They were describing how the third shot on the 17th hole in the fourth round cost him the tournament. In reality, the player in question ended up one shot behind the champion after 72 holes played over four days. Each of them had over 275 shots, and the champion was one shot better in this particular tournament.
Any single shot during the four-day tournament could have made the difference. If you can take that kind of responsibility for every shot and not place blame at any particular point, you have a far better chance of reaching success in a golf tournament or any endeavor of life.
Abraham Lincoln described maturity as the ability to act with intensity and integrity long before the crisis arrives. If you can shift the pressure and the focus of the last-second shot, the final exam, or the year end sales results to everyday life, you will be far ahead. If you perform each task to your utmost, you will seldom face a critical test, shot, or business report.
I treasure the time I have been privileged to spend with my friend Coach John Wooden. He is the most successful coach of all time. He taught his players and lives his life as if everything is important, but nothing is critical. Everything matters, but nothing can make or break you.
As you go through your day today, accept responsibility for your actions, and avoid blaming others.
Today’s the day!
When you are late for a commitment you have made, you instantly mentally blame the traffic, the incompetent cashier at the gas station, and the woefully-inadequate parking. When a colleague is late, you instantly are able to blame their lack of commitment, their poor planning, and overall irresponsible nature.
Tolerance comes when we take responsibility for our own performance and try to understand other people’s intentions. This is hard to do, but few things that are worthwhile are easy. When we fail to take responsibility for our current situation, we give elements outside of our control far too much power. In the process of blaming external factors, we turn over the steering wheel and the accelerator to randomness.
There is always an excuse for failure, whether it is real or imaginary. In the final analysis, failure will bear no excuse, and success needs no explanation. Only those who take full responsibility for where they are today can control where they can be tomorrow.
As I’m dictating this column, I just finished enjoying the satellite coverage of the U.S. Open golf tournament. At the conclusion of the four-day event, the announcers and knowledgeable commentators were discussing slow motion replays of a shot taken by a player who ended up in second place. They were describing how the third shot on the 17th hole in the fourth round cost him the tournament. In reality, the player in question ended up one shot behind the champion after 72 holes played over four days. Each of them had over 275 shots, and the champion was one shot better in this particular tournament.
Any single shot during the four-day tournament could have made the difference. If you can take that kind of responsibility for every shot and not place blame at any particular point, you have a far better chance of reaching success in a golf tournament or any endeavor of life.
Abraham Lincoln described maturity as the ability to act with intensity and integrity long before the crisis arrives. If you can shift the pressure and the focus of the last-second shot, the final exam, or the year end sales results to everyday life, you will be far ahead. If you perform each task to your utmost, you will seldom face a critical test, shot, or business report.
I treasure the time I have been privileged to spend with my friend Coach John Wooden. He is the most successful coach of all time. He taught his players and lives his life as if everything is important, but nothing is critical. Everything matters, but nothing can make or break you.
As you go through your day today, accept responsibility for your actions, and avoid blaming others.
Today’s the day!