Win Win Conflict Resolution
High Powered Energy Transformation!
by Rick Sidorowicz

Conflict is a necessary and vital by-product of high performance. The ‘sparks’, friction and ‘turbulence’ that develop in and around high powered individuals and high performing work teams is a natural occurrence of breaking new ground and challenging the status quo. 

How we ‘hold’ conflict and how we ‘handle’ it can re-energize our spirits and strengthen individuals’ alignment to a common purpose. A few reference points for when the going gets rough:

Hold a ‘purpose’ of developing trust and rapport - hold it firm to see the ‘content’ of conflict within a ‘context’ of trust and common purpose;

Tell the truth - it always breaks through barriers and makes things ‘happen’;

Specify, clarify and define the desired outcome - the uncompromising resolution of conflict within the context of trust and ‘alignment’ to go forward;

Stay ‘centered’ in the conflict - in the present; focus on what’s happening now - this is where and when solutions emerge;

Remain flexible and able to respond - hold your position ‘gently’ yet inescapably ‘in the action,’ and ‘on-site’;

Suspend judgment, remove all blame and focus on what works - the alignment to go forward is the objective;

If strong negative emotions surface - acknowledge the feelings and ask of yourself and the other - What needs to happen now? What needs to change? What can I (we) do to use this energy constructively? This energy is the vital ‘juice’ that can be channeled into high powered personal alignment;

If resistance arises, explore it and use it rather than creating a battle of wills;

Be willing to be illogical - the fundamental issues are generally not grounded in logic, reason and fact - but in perception, self image and pride;

Focus on going ‘beyond winning’ as opposed to merely ‘not losing’; give everyone permission to win;

Talk about what you are doing that is not working; search for alternate meanings that will satisfy the situation and meet everyone’s needs more productively without compromising vital interests in the outcome;

Use metaphors, analogies and stories that match the situation you are facing;

Use humour - if this situation were funny, what would you be laughing at?

Be willing to identify and go beyond habit and typical patterns of behaviour;

Seek the unexpected;

Search for the second, third or fourth correct solution;

Accept that stress and ‘creative tension’ is needed to go beyond into breakthrough;

Hold the ‘context’ and ‘purpose’ clearly in view as the inescapable framework for this activity of conflict resolution and personal alignment.

And when it’s not working re-examine your purpose and objectives and look for the ‘truth’. Dealing ‘ruthlessly’ with reality will always break through to the fundamental issues.

Rick Sidorowicz is the Publisher and Editor of The CEO Refresher and
the Minister of Culture of High Performance Retail.

Many more articles in Performance Improvement in The CEO Refresher Archives


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